这是深夜，睡不着时花了两个小时做好的一道甜点。我给它取名为 红薯糯米糕

昨天哭得很难受。平时的我很少哭，因为长大后的我觉得很多事情都不值得我去哭了。唯独伤到了我的心如此厉害才会如此。疯狂地在半夜两点打国内朋友的电话：一个没有开机，一个忘记号码，一个在医院陪男朋友的妈妈，一个在宁波开会，一个在上课，一个在工作，一个待在家里，我只是需要有人来分担我的悲伤才能得以缓解。或是随便聊聊天也好啊。这样不至于太难受。

我决定从学校外面搬到学校宿舍区住了。想改变一下环境让自己的生活变得更简单一点更平静一些。虽然有些东西会割舍不下，但我实在是不想卷入某场分手的漩涡当中，按我的性格，最后和事佬的后果都是很惨的。就像昨天。我不想让自己受伤，我不能一次又一次受到友谊的伤害。总是在友谊加深的同时又害怕会在感情无能为力地变淡后自己的心里会难受。我要保护自己，一直保护好自己，在没有人保护我的现在。

 我就是这么绝情起来了。讨厌自己的同时又极其地心疼自己。

It is really funny and weird to take the photos you like with you when you are travelling around ,wondering without any destination at the street. I am doing the exact thing I have descried here.

I am trying to find a palace I can call home and feel the safety to be a lonely one, no matter where it is ,no matter who it wll be, just one tiny place can release my pressure and passion towards this world ,this stranger 'cause I really realized that ONLY have we one chance and one time to meet the soulmate and bossom friend through all ths life.

Chatting with many strangers in MSN is the fancy I recently dash throw myself in there. HEHE, it is cute.I just want to have any trance in this city with my digital cinema and my feetprints on some places I have never been there before for nearlly six years in this city. I feel empty and nothing is so special to me before my leaving here.

I always believe that the more beautiful is just waiting outside of this city and out of my mind which is beyond my imagination and pursuing for those days.

I was told and informed that how gorgeous I will be if I just see through myself without lilmitations and refinement.It is just some crazy stuff for me .

Something has to be done and the result I will see and wait, I just hope that those beautiful things can be waiting for me to take pictures for them and tell me that How nice I will be with them some day some time some moment.

I am afraid MY SLOW reflection and reaction nerve will hurt them and myself sometimes. I am not so sensitive with details and so straight to others.

I cannot tolerate some unfair situation happened around me, it is my priciple to be an inheritive person for my own experience for almost 25years .

Well, I just want to sort out messing things and slove some problems led by my carelessness and ingorance in my daily life.

I know I can feel , haha ,the English version of my BLOG will scare some friends who are always stopping by here before AND never come back BUT you know ,yes , I just neglect and continue my own style and future promise with myself.

THE less the better.It is my belief always .

One isn't necessarily born with courage ,but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practise any other virture with consistency. we cannot be kind ,merciful, generous or honest.

YOU CAN FEEL AND IMAGINE THIS:

it is daydreaming of being at my home on a warm afternoon, with my fans around , watching motes of dust fall onto beams of sunlight,hearing the songs of vienna teng.

The states of awareness we currently perceive are only a thing fraction of the whole . The continuum extends deep into unphysical areas of the universe far beyond our current physical comprehension.

One last question: can we be ourselves just like we were yersterday???